goodbye 2010, hello2011

it's 31 Dec 2010. The last day of 2010.

Let's say goodbye to 2010 and welcome 2011.
May everyone of us have a great year in 2011. All the best, my dears :)


recently, many 2010回顾in tv shows. So, I think gonna have a 2010 Ky's flashback here. hehe :)

Jan.
woww, this was the Jan2010's Ky. Look so young. now, really old jor :(


Feb.
OMG !! satu bulan shj, aku telah jadi macam ini?! Finally I knew why friends always say I macam aunty -.- I admit it now, LOL !
Feb, cny lo. I remember, I lost many money to Faye Kor. HAHAA. we had carlsberg at lynn's house. great time we spent :) and I always use to keep reminding friends and myself to study because SPM is "near". lol. what a joke.
and, I got my new pinky phone - w705 :)


March.
hmm, tak dapat cari picture le. what happened le? Ohya! busy practicing for Choir competition. As we had told that the competition will be held on April. LOL. althought, at last there aren't any competition for us,but i think the time we spent together is great :) As life have no take two.


April.

LOL. memang 欠打punye muka. *like* haha

Since, my blog had never appears this two dears' picture. LOL. Zy and Serene :) A lots of memory about them and it's really undescribable. It's just great :) love u.
May is the month of Frean n Zy's birthday too. and another picture of May that i love most already post on my page. with that 3 silly monkeys :P hehehe.


May.
I had picture of this month ! and it must be upload !! picture of me, lying on the Sentosa Hospital -.- Aku telah kena dengue bulan ni. sudah skip mid term exam. and got last in class. sux
I have the picture of me 吊水-ing. tangan dan the pipe with water pun ada blood. disgusting right? haha. but that time, i had no strength to 反抗。



June.


Seriously, I miss my long hair now. and, all there picture were from facebook cause my memory card had lost ><

Sook Wei, Bsim n Ky :)

Ky and Richard. I love this, because I macam korean in this picture. don't u have the same view as me? I sure you're ! hahaha.

Ky and Jeff :) another undescribable guy in my life ! Lots of memories. xD

Here we go :) All of us.

Since there're many pretty picture took in June. lol. Outing with Te's friends :)


July.
LOL. I had such a picture for July. hahaha. -.-
Broga Hill. Family trip. Sudah ada picture at my post of the day.

August.

HAHAHAH. At Green Apple with Issac :) The first time he fetch me out. (i think so.)

Jump !! Fly !!

Memorable day. First time shout Merdeka so seriously on stage! lol ! no more 遗憾。haha
I love Malaysia:) haha

Sept.
no picture for Sept. because, it's trial month. it's a very tiring month for me. ya, I still remember how i study that time. It's crazy !


Oct.
Same, no pictures -.-
Half month gave to trial i think. And what I am thinking in these few months was SPM n books only.. lol


Nov.
My birthday !Sweet 17 :)

Dec.
pictures still in friends' phone. anyway, its a great month :)



so many pictures in my phone. but cant connect it with usb cable. ishh...
nevermind, LOL !

HAPPY NEW YEAR !!

心声啊 ♥ 哈哈

越长大，越难和另一个人在一起。

不是因为条件。还是有人喜欢你，你也活得比以前更好，不再那么任性，更像在投资的艺术品。

也不是因为对爱情死心。在KTV突然听到的某首歌，会让你不自禁模糊了视线。一些场景，一些气息，始终无法忘怀。朋友帮你介绍时，你也会满心期待。

却依然单身。闭上眼睛吹蜡烛的时候，总是希望身边有另一个人一起许愿。一些客气的场合，有人来搭讪，话题围绕着你单身的原因。而他们最后给出的结论是，你太挑了。你在心里面笑，所以其他人都不挑？

其实你自己知道，为什么不能好好谈一场恋爱。就是因为，你太清楚自己是怎样的一块料，所以不会再轻而易举把自己交出去。就像是，有一天你发现跌倒以后的伤口，会开始留下疤痕，于是走路时不敢再大步跨出去。

因为，你惯性太强、记性太好。认识一个人很简单，忘记一个人很困难。你曾经心满意足的闭上眼睛，让另一个人带你去任何地方，最后却差点回不来。所以不能再失去方向感。

于是你就变得胆小了。以前喜欢男生有幽默感，现在更在乎安全感。以前打电话找不到人就拼命的打，现在发了短信没回应，即使心中有波动也可以忍住。以前最有兴趣的话题是对方的过去，现在会先关心这份感情有没有未来。

所以，空暇的时候，你宁愿和朋友在烈日下逛街，也不愿让对方觉得自己很在乎什么。你安慰自己，有朋友就够了，一个人生活也很好。你忘记了当另一个人女朋友的感觉，当那个人出现时，你开始慌张、害怕。

只 是，你并不是一定要单身，就像你也没计划过一定用哪只手写字。不过是，既然如此了那就这样吧。你想要有人一起旅行，一起看电影。你想和那个人说自己准备好 了，只是没有勇气，请对方多一点耐心。你想说不再需要太多惊喜，在心里等的是一份相守以望的感情，抬起头来相视而笑，安心的生活，如此而已。

When i go through this note in Facebook, I were like... OMG ! Why this people knew exactly how I think and feel? Even myself, can't write out my feeling so! GREAT ♥ Really awesome !!

失望? 不！

“人最大的失望是對自己的失望。無論我對別人多麼失望，也比不上我對自己的失望。我可以撇下那個一再讓我失望的人，卻永遠無法撇掉自己。失望是人對自己最深沉的嘆息。為什麼我從來沒有我以為的那麼好？為什麼我做不到自己的期望？當我如此真實地面對自己，我不得不承認，我再也沒有資格對別人失望”

在我很欣赏的作家- 张小娴的Facebook看到了这段话。真的非常的认同。人，最大的失望莫过于对自己失望。一直很努力在做好，一直很努力很努力，真的希望，我的努力不是白费的。我也知道，为了达成我要的成果，我已经忽略了一些重要的东西。毕竟，有得必有失。人，总不能太贪心。所以，在我正努力追求着我的梦想时，我选择了暂时的放弃它。对或错，我真的不知道。放弃了，我不遗憾，也希望，没有令我后悔的一天。


“你要求太高了，这样会很辛苦的。”
曾经，有一位非常好的朋友很认真的看着我，跟我说这几个字。可是对我而言，要求不高，我是不会全力以赴做到最好的。no matter in the sense of what. 当然，效果没有自己想象的那么好时，失望了，伤心了，还是得接受，再努力过。只是，唯一担心的，机会不再，时光已流。我相信，只要我不放弃，成功一定离我不远的。我坚信着这个信念。

人生，总会遇到许多分岔路。现在的我，就站在这且平静又恐怖的分岔路。眼前，似乎微微闪烁着灯光，可是，当我鼓起勇气，踏出第一步时，那光莫名其妙的，灭了。不要紧，我相信，一定会有那里一天有一位贵人会帮我的 :) 你，也会帮我吧? :) 加油！

lethargic

Its a very tiring day..


don't know why, maybe because lack of sleep?
today went for the first gathering of the 7Monkeys after SPM2010 :)

Whenever we talk about what course to take, I felt like I am helpless. Who's there to give me some advises? I have so much question marks in my mind. IB / CE ? it's two very different path.


Sigh. I am really tired of my current life actually. except cookies, it's drama. Help ! My phone was like turned into a hotline for someone. Whole day long, I only receives calls n messages from someone. annoyed. Ishh.


Headache. I am really tired. good night.
Weird, I miss u today :)

Ky

喜欢一个人就去争取 :)

喜欢一个人就去争取

不管最后怎么样

你怕什么?

怕尴尬?

怕对方不同意你?

那你不说你就不会后悔吗?

自己一个人再想我到底说不说呢?

我原来就是这样

但我现在不会了

喜欢就去说！

当然是抱着失败的可能性去说的

但不管怎么说

我对得起自己

我不会有任何遗憾

对方也知道我的想法了

能不能在一起就看缘分了

但我要做的我做了

喜欢一个人就去珍惜

我写完那篇文章以后

看到了有很多人也刚分手

也挺难过的、也想着对方

那都在想着

为什么不主动跟他说呢?

要等他来跟你说

假如两个人都抱着这样的想法

最后分手了值吗?

面子就这样重要吗?

人有时候要知道要面子

有时候真的不用

这时候面子算个屁啊！

喜欢一个人就要学会相信

我个人觉得相信对方很重要

真的很重要！

不要老想对方会做什么事

其实对方什么也没做

好多事都是自己胡思乱想的

最后还因为这样的胡思乱想而吵架

我觉得这样真的很不值

有什么问题就问

但相信对方很重要

你既然跟他在一起了

为什么不学会相信他呢?

喜欢一个人要学会等待

如果你真的很喜欢一个人

即使他不喜欢你

如果你下定决心了就要学会等待

不用说太多话

说太多反而会烦

自己用事实来证明

喜欢一个人要学会宽容

也不要太在意别人的看法

别人可能觉得你们不合适

合不合适你最清楚

反正是你们过生活

管那么多干嘛啊?

两人在一起开心就他么够了

最后喜欢一个人要学会付出

你付出虽然不一定会得到相同的回报

但她一定能感受的到

只有你付出了

你才有资格让别人也付出

不是么?

喜欢一个人当然要学会努力

不可能你什么都不做

人家会主动找你的

除非他喜欢你

你要义无反顾的努力

不要想结果怎么样

最起码你努力了

最起码能对得起自己

喜欢一个就去追

想要珍惜要快去珍惜

希望每个情侣都开开心心的

is this correct? LOL.

Copy from a note I saw in Facebook :)

Eve, Xmas , Boxing day :)

many things to talk about actually.

hmmm, what first?

...

Christmas "countdown" 2010 first ba ;)
LOL. It's a very crazy Christmas eve I had. I spent my times with Frean, Jeff and also Issac :) It's always the best time ! We had Korean food there, it's okay actually. but someone break their name. HAHAHA. Pictures ... waiting for Issac to upload :) *faster ya ;) *


Christmas day of 2010.
I spent whole day for cookies. From noon to 9 only we finished everything. Although we dated to go to Pavillion for photo section at night, but the rain had delay out cookies process :( The family-christmas-day-plan had gone. but then, aunt came and bring me and mum to The Curve for tea :) hehe. We went to Chocolate Launch. OMG ! The chocolate was awesomeee !! :) I had fall in love with it. I will be back ! :D


Boxing day :)
No boxes here. No Christmas present for me :( But the joys is the greatest present for me, actually. HEHEHE.
But then, what really annoying is that someone keep texting over, and asking some freaking lame and make-me-bekcek's question. Please, don't ask those brainless + impossible question okayy? ishh! Ya, what Kun said was right. Yup, maybe what someone said was correct. I had changed. indeed, I had learned how to treat guy like you. I am not that soft hearted to you anymore. This is what you taught me, thanks. Just don't ask me Why. It just simply because u taught me these ! and now, get lost ! I love my current life. I have my dream to chase of.

Love,
Ky.

Dears, really sorry.

为什么每次都是这样? 那么的容易就掉眼泪。不是伤心，只是激动一些些，眼泪就一直一直流。



Issac, Frean and Jeff, really sorry... I really wish to celebrate with u all... But sorry, I can't T.T


我不会忘记今天的每一样事情。我会永远记得。谢谢你。
希望，你也记得我跟你说的东西。

无话可说。

entitle

I had wrote a long post actually, but... before i title it. I had deleted it. Aiks, after typing everything out, I felt better :) Gonna rest, bye !

child abuse.

child abuse?


seriously, no matter in the state of what, children is always the innocent one.
as a parents, child abuse is really a can-not-do-action! no matter how the child act and how old they are.
but, yesterday mum receive a call from my aunt, telling us that.. one of my cousin sister (who we seldom contact) had looked up in a police station and her 8-years-old boy was in comma and currently at hospital. how cruel is thing incident? I can't really believe that this thing really happened around me. Seriously, I just saw the little boy once when he's still a very young boy (many years ago) and also my cousin sister...I can't remember her face. but the impression of the boy in mind never change since I meet him the very first and last time. I always use to describe him with words like, a child who is different with others, a very unhappy child. and what mum told me was, because he have no parental loves. as his dad had dumped my cousin sis and him since he were almost 1 year old. Aiks. Why?! said wanna give them a better life by going to others country to work, but?! Had a new family there! wtf.

And now, he was in comma, staying in ICU for almost a week already. dad disallow us to visit him as my uncle doesn't wish to let so many people know about it. But my aunt did went to visit the poor little boy, all bruises all around his body, 3 fingers had cut because the cells there had died, the most ridiculous was... some of his skull had scattered. Even if he awake, he will be a little abnormal. :( Why? Just a 8-year-old child. Why he deserve such a cruel lifestyle? How pain he was, and no one knows. I really felt guilty for not contacting them for so many years although i know, my cousin sister always don't let us to know where she is, what are she doing, even when we're around her house, she don't allow us to visit there. Aiks !! I think, my cousin sister must be have mental problem as no one shows care to her, even her parents ! dammit! May god bless them :(

P/s : If u're not prepared to take care of another new life, please, don't give a life to them ! Irresponsible ! You had spoiled one's life! You're the murder of his life ! Brainless.

爱我，你怕了吗? O_O??

有听过这首个吗? 之前，听过..就觉得这首个很有意思下。
昨天，他跟我说，每次听到这首歌都会想到我..有点吓到啦..
他说，很像我跟他说的东西...
“爱我你怕了吗?眼泪你忘了吗?...”
然后又说，“敢爱敢恨敢失去” 很像我~
唉，完全就不是嘛~
似乎，有点伤到他太深了:(
我也没说很直接啊~ 怎么办...? 糟糕。该怎么办啊?~~
对不起。~.~

Edu Fair

hu~ exhausted.

today went to edu fair.. asked many things. initially was interested in business management, but then after listening to the professor and discussing with parents, I think international business is better. hmm, but if INTI, the fees is quite expensive la. if i could get a scholarship then I will ha tve the chance to study there. but if not, then I will be a UTAR student :) but, need to go to Perak campus. Although parents doesn't wish me to go there, especially dad, but I wish to try to be independent :) LOL ! International Business need to study account. hmm, will it be difficult for me as I dont have account base.. aiks. gonna check with teacher tomorrow.

______________

Yayy :)
Just now drive again. but today isn't as good as the first time.
because, today I drive manual. OMG ! It's really tough
kaki pun dah cramp. -.-
A little bit scare jor~ erghh...
Just now, when we change back the seat...scared by my brother..
really, hati pun dah nak keluar.. aiyo..
why can't I be a little bit more brave?!
little bit thing then scared -.-
anyway, i prefer auto ~~ HAHAHA.

玛丽外宿中。

《玛丽外宿中》第10集，看完了。

看完了，心情真的很不好呐。
不是因为个人因素啦，只是...戏中，男主角和女主角的感情好像有问题了。很怕有什么事情发生。
为什么就不给机会，心平气和的谈一下呢?

之前，明明就是都喜欢对方的。都不说。
男生啊，喜欢就一定要说，不要有遗憾。虽然说时代不一样了，不分男女，可是...在某些事情，还是跟传统比较好~ 呵呵。
好不容易男主角知道了，跟她说了，真的很sweet叻~
现在又有问题。
为什么不谈一下啊?
明明就是能解决的小问题。
呼，心情超烂的。
希望，有一个好的结局吧~

我落泪 情绪零碎

最近在追韩剧。《玛丽外宿中》不错看。
有帅哥，可爱的女孩。

不知道为什么啊，这两天都非常的emo。
怎么办?我不想。
心事谁人知? 又能跟谁说呢?
变得越来越不爱跟朋友说心事了。

人，是群体动物。
可是，前阵子的我。
我越来越倾向单独了。
喜欢一个人。什么都一个人。


不安于现状了。
感觉上，路人都是一大群的。不然，就双双对对的。
我呢?
....
......
无言。


我渴望爱情，但我不稀罕爱情。
话，是怎么说吗?
至于你，真的很抱歉。
啊!!!! 超不耐烦的!
为什么啊? 每次都这样。
坏人，我不想当了。
婉转的话，不想说了。
难道，就不能有个让我能说...“嗯” 的人吗?
“对不起...我不想:) ” 我不想再说了。



我不落泪，忍住感觉.... T.T
这感觉叫...思念 吗?我忘了。

无奈。

变。
我真的对这个字感到很恐惧。
它，只有简单的笔画；却比想象中复杂 （copy 爱不单行's lyrics,LOL）

人会变，月会圆。
变得好与坏，就在于我们如何看待一件事情。可是，对我而言，她变了。变成一个很陌生的人，变得一个我非常非常不认同的人。 就是这样，我们之间...也时常起争执。无可否认，因为她，也有许多不愉快的事情发生。不止一次，两次。 劝也劝了，骂也骂了。甚至在你面前说到崩溃，眼泪不停的流，你还是不改? 你知道你自己真的错了吗? 心，真的很痛。为什么是她? 为什么不是别人? 我真的对她很失望。


_________________________________________________________________


是不是越不想，越忌的事情，就越会发生在身上? 真的很奇怪耶~
最近，有种莫名的感觉。真的很奇怪。明明自己之前，都口口声声说过，不可能的。
为什么最近....? 哎哟。都快疯掉了。
奇怪。
真的吗? O_O ??

有灵魂的我? LOL

最近，快考spm啦...还剩下，完完全全没把握的 - 华语。

家人甚至朋友们，都不断的在唠叨我。“还不去读华语啊你...”“很得空是不是？很有信心了哦？厉害了咯？”哈哈。我的性格嘛～当然是顶回他们的咯...hehe.可是，心里却真的很欣慰下的...也很害怕这一科。我真的有读，可是...语文科跟别的科目不一样，不能在几天内就能upgrade...我也不知道要读些什么。作文？有啊，每天都拿着文杰借我的书来读，名句?也有，读那些可爱可爱的咯~ 至于文言文嘛~ 还是一样，他懂我，我不懂她。唉... 现在不是时候埋怨自己没脑去拿这科了，唯有...花完我这几天的精力在这科所谓有灵魂的科目。"The result doesn't matter, what really matter was your efford." right? hehe.. I will always remember what YOU had told me :) 加油！拼了!!

D R I V E

OMGGGG !!

I drive, I drive, I DRIVE !!!
yay yayy :))

Bye SPM Bye Bio

yay yay yayyyyyyyyy !! Arghhhhhhhhh ~~ HAHAHAHA.

HUuuuuuuuuuu :D I will not forget the feeling of today ...

解放的感觉。越来就是如此!
期待了整整一年的一天，终于来了。感觉，的确跟想象中不一样。感觉格外的轻松，自在，自由!真的，做完了那无聊的paper3 后，还有半个小时。可是，感觉却真的兴奋。无可否认，之前，我真的没有花心思在这科一直都很懊恼的科目-bio。 昨天的我，真的疯了。把自己关在房里一整天，就是在 face book. 今天，又把我最好的表现出来吗?有! hehehe. 我已经尽力了吗?不敢说啦， 毕竟form4 都玩玩下的。只是，本小姐已经仁至义尽 XD HAHAHA. 超兴奋，不知要怎么形容。 可是，就是要把这个一生一次的解放感发泄在这里 ....

泪了。

不知道为什么，我真的很想大哭一场。
可是，眼泪却很不听话。
想要哭时，就是偏偏不出来见人。不想时，往往就不请自来。
到底发生了什么事?
我只想说，我真的很不开心。

心事谁人知? 我也不知呐。
心很烦。烦什么? BIO? 不至于吧?
就是很moody。
昨天，也是。
可是因为我的表妹在，那调皮到难以形容的猴子，总是能令到我笑。
小孩就是那么的天真无邪。
开心不开心都写在脸上。
只要不开心，哭了，所有人都会想办法迁就，帮她。
可是，长大了呢? 很多事情，因为明白了，想多了，顾虑多了。
也不再什么都摆在脸上了，让别人担忧。
谁来帮我呢?唯有自己。
一个人听歌，一个人流泪，一个人看戏，一个人...
有时真的想跟姐说下心事，可是，为什么我们都抽不到时间呢?
是不愿意，还是时间不允许呢?
....
.......
为什么，说到家人，眼泪还是会流?
朋友说，不是姐不在乎，是我太在意。
是吗? ...
以前的我们，不是这样的。
看过一篇文章；
一个人，单身久了，就会越来越注重亲情。
是吗? ...
我只知道，世上没有任何一样东西..
比我家人重要。
比我父母重要。
时间快点的过，我真的很想赶快达成我的心愿。
看见他们...
一天比一天的老，
每天说这里痛哪里不舒服，
我真的很怕。我觉得我很没用。
我很怕，很怕等我有能力时，他们却...T.T