apologize and convocation

Att :friends that called me yesterday.



sorry ya,guys. yesterday was my sister's convocation. i went out for the whole day without my phone. as my phone was out of credit and I'm thinking that no one will contact me so i just leave it at home. sorry ya,guys. damn weird. when my phone is with me,it doesn't ring. aiks. yesterday when i switch on my phone. shock. maxis keep on sending message to me. sweat. and also i missed a few important message and calls. sorry ya. i missed a call from my dear issac n hanjoe. but if i received i also can't make it because i think im having dinner with my family at Sg.Buloh . sorry guys. miss u all a lot.




Convocation.
while those graduands walking into the hall.my tears feel like coming out.i just don't know why.feel curious about it too. i just hope that i can walk into the hall like them too. i know i must do very very hard to achieve this. yesterday, while they're introducing those courses that UTAR have, dad n mum asked me which course will i take. my mind was blank. i don't know. I'm interested in psychology but..i don't really clear and know more about it.or...be a chemist as i love chemistry a lot. or...physicist?lols.hate physic. it's time to think about it seriously.not much time left for me to fool around. I'm a big girl now (: haha. my sweet 16 is approaching. besides, yesterday, a speech given by Pro.Chua. said that we got to thank each n everyone beside us especially our parents. they gave us many supports in many ways, directly and indirectly. without our parents' love, we can't achieve such a good result. and many about families and parents stuff he said.it's so touching.but before he say these,he gave a very long long long speech about ...about..i don't know what.dad n i nod off. lols. i know it's damn no manners. in the hall, while it's Gina turn.. i was thinking whats feeling my dad n mum have? i think they must be very proud of her.and a prove of their sacrifices. love u,daddy mummy. *muacks.

By,
KY.yan

congratulation,Gina (:

tired,tired and tired. went out for whole day. my dear sister's Gina convocation (: congratulation. *muacks. will upload those photo next time as im damn tired now. will talk about convocation's stuff in detail next time. good night,guys.

tired Friday.

damn tired. lols. today learn some new jazz's stuff. i think i prefer new jazz then locking. but it's just some pose of new jazz too sexy that make me feel like dare not to do. lols. as I'm ... well.

damn geram lo,today. went to Kasturi for my Chemistry class. go over there,eh?why the board wrote form 1?go to the notice board and check. Chemistry class canceled?? ask the auntie. bull shit. teacher on mc. wth. this is damn...aiks.why don't they inform few? at least they will spread it out what.quickly ask y.mun call lynn. fortunately dad haven't go back and the traffic is smooth. if not, i think Kasturi sure give my dad a very bad image.

arhh,my forehead pop another pimple out again. suck. just now view those photo album in my sis's lappy.wow, i look so young last year. it's really a very big different between last year's Ky and this year's Ky. i miss that, look so young. because of the hair style?or...i already old?omg.no !!!I'm still 15.lols.waiting for my 16.sweet 16 man (: hope that my 16th birthday won't "celebrate" like my 15th birthday. damn sad.): i think my 15th birthday is the worst birthday i ever have.i hope that is the 1st time and also last time (:

kay la,guys.really got to go to bad right now.my eye can't open already.night (: muacks.

anti-pimples.
Ky. yan

H1N1 vs L.O.V.E

During Kumar's class. as usual,each n everytime he came in the 1st thing he do is to "report" to us what had happened recently. it's quite good actually. can get news without reading through newspaper.ya,today he said about H1N1. so sad to hear that HK having H3N3. it spread faster than H1N1. upgraded? lols. got to listen to the news later to confirm.

suck,i think i am having fever right now.and also a bit of sore throat. H...1..N1? choi!really,few of the peoples around me having cough n flu.the scarier was the girl(from my school) sitting behind me during Kumar's class.while Kumar telling us H1N1 stuff. she keep on coughing,non-stop. Jeff and i was..omg!lols. anyway,H1N1 is getting more serious nowadays. so guys,don't always think that a little cough or flu never mind. please go and check with doctor. don't harm the others. like what Kumar used to say, don't play a fool with it. lols. *feel like promoting Kumar.


congratulation!
today's physic class i paid 3/4 attention.lols.today's lesson was..GAS LAW.we learned Charles' Law,Boyle's Law and Pressure Law. lols.feel so successful that i can name the laws.-.- it's a good start for August.I'm hunting part-time job la guys.but the only thing bothering me was the time.my locking class.i just not willing to cancel my locking class. *moody.

L.O.V.E
I feel happy with my love life now. simple. ya,there's someone that i admire. it's just a little admire. simple n nice. we're just friend,a very normal friend. so i can demand nothing from him. I will feel damn happy when i saw him even just a sight. it's enough. but even i didn't see him,i will just complain to my dear Faye.that's all.of course sometime will have some over-imagination that make JFC feel beh tahan. simple+ nice. need not to worry will him go and know other girl or what.will not get hurt also. (: wanna join my club? *smile

following the flow ~

hey guys.
first n foremost,
got to story about my ear.
aiks.
yesterday, my dear Faye gave me a "diamond" earing.
it's purple in color = amethyst ear ring?lols.
at night,finally decide to change.
don't know where i find my courage from to change the ear ring.
cause the third lubang is damn difficult to put inside.
i think is because the aunty tembak sengetly. =(
wasai..
keep on put into it also cannot.
i think i suffer from this problem about 1hour.
finally..i cool myself down.
go n take a bath 1st ~
then can jor ==
scared me.

very good job.
i did a very good job ~
hehe.
wondering should i view her blog?
but no.
i didn't do so.
i said, i just wanna follow the flow.
as i said in the previous article.
i rather i don't know evrything.
i rather Mr.Lynn didn't send me her link before.
Lynn a,Lynn ~~~
okay,i said my life is coming back.
yoyoyo ~~~
oh ya, i didn't tell T about what i read from her blog.
why?
i tell him everything happened to me.
i trust him very much.
he can consider my best friend. [of course not as best as issac them.]
the cause i don't want tell him is because..
* he did something when i tell him about Hao's incident.
* i hope that her n my stuff doesn't involve anyone.i know if i tell him what i read in her blog sure he will say many bad things.so, i choosed not to tell him.
should i tell dad n mum about what i read from the blog.
sure they will "produce" many chance for us to talk. aiks. and sure i will be lectured by them again.okay, yan. don't listen to the other. just follow the flow.everything will be fine.need not to care what others think. support u !!
from now on,
no viewing her blog,
no telling others about her stuff,
no thinking much.
just follow the flow ~~
sometime,i was thinking,
will she see what i wrote?
lols.won't lahh,she doesn't have ur blog link okay?
so..write whatever u like here.Ky. =)
actually,the only thing i wish to know is..
who is the one that tell lie?
she or her boy?
this is the truth that i always wanna unveil it.
if our relationship become rotten till like this,all is because of her boy telling lie.
i think i will kill him. and i will feel damn regret on what i did n what i said.

JKFC.
huiyo...this name sound so familiar huh?lols.
long time didn't call this name lehh..
hhmm... actually nothing to write about us lehh..
is just..really long time didn't go out together.
the last time was..when huh?
the day we go for bowling right?
lols.
*muacks.

4 mulia.
huiyo..this class.
apa macam?beh tahan.
always catch catch catch.
the funniest was..pro.Hing.
yesterday,
he was aimed to be catch.
he just lie down calmly as he knows that he can do nothing to defense.
right?
lols. Ga Yao.
Wei Ling too..
haha..so cute ~ but sien lahh..always kacau him also damn serious de.. ==
joke with him but he answer me with a damn damn serious answer. Faye n i was...okay okay ~

ya,recently busy doing a drama for my English oral test.
it's about Lesbian.
lols. interesting right?
got to ask pro.Hing them to record it when we do the oral test.
lols.will upload if recorded.haha.
the 1st reaction of Mr.Malek when he knows that our topic was Lesbian is...huh?no kissing,okay?haha.the "funny" face he showed.

goodluck, guys.

Ky.yan

on my way back.

some thing happened made me feel regret that i wrote the article before this.
well..

u still the same.
heart break.

my life coming back.
KY.yan

confuse 2

guys,
it's bothering me.
whenever i see her face.
things floating out on my mind.
i just wanna stop everything. and back to my original life.

okay,
if u really wanna apologize,
why don't u do so?
i know, sometime it's damn difficult to say out..S.O.R.R.Y to friend right?
i felt the same before.
but..at least don't act like a witch or whatever i dislike lorr..okay?
shit !
y m i talking these type of craps???? KY a !!!! aiks.

next,
i really feel curious about what make u feel sorry to me?
isn't the same thing that make me hate u?
or...others stuffs that i don't know?
if it's really about the stuff that make me hate u,
why?
why that day that when u act rude to my mum and both of us argue..
u will said so..
said that i create a story out?
it's true.
what my dad n i said to ur dad is the truth of the truth.
but why?why u said that i very pro in creating stories?

may god bless me.
i just wanna stop thinking..
the article she wrote.
the incident.
the happiness time v spent 2gether.
the 100th month anniversary.
the name.
everything !!!!

STOP EVERYTHING RIGHT NOW!
i want my life back !
i rather i didn't read through the article.
i rather my hate toward her getting lesser and lesser and make she disappear in my life.

u know?
she.
she really know me very well.
still remember.
actually what really happening i not really remember.
the point is..
she say everything that in my mind.
u know?
every single word she said is definitely same as what i wanna say.
that time i was...SHOCK.
and she was just perasan'ing and say..geng lehh?
well ~

i think 10 memories is enough for me to refresh.
i just don't know how to face the others if our friendship suddenly "transform" to become as good as last time.
peoples used to say we're sisters and can't differentiate us. [the uncle that stay infront of my house]
hey people,
both of us so big different okay?
one eye big one small. ==

well..
just follow the flow.
we can do nothing.
bak kata pepatah,
多一个朋友，多一条路；多一个敌人，多一道墙。[must praise me menggunakan peribahasa yg sesius.lols]

may god bless us,
i just hope that u will feel regret on what u did,
and please,
stop doing those stupid things that will definitely regret.
that's all i wanna tell u.

Ky.yan

confuse !

sucks,
what happened to u????
no no no no no !!!
she's evil !!!
don't believe any single word she wrote !!
it's just lies.
u know her well right?
no !!
don't drop ur stupid tears Ky !!
oh my gosh !!!

ya,i admit what she wrote is really...made me feel that..it's time to end my hate towards her.
but another inner voice telling me that,
no..she's just a liar.
she is a damn good actor.
sometimes,i fresh back..or whenever friends ask me y didn't friend with her ady..
i recalled back the incident.
it's actually a damn little thing.
don't u think so?
but why?
i just take it so seriously at the moment?
maybe is because im a Aries too?
or.. T always say her bad things to me?
as u all know that, im a easy-influenced by others girl.
well well well ~
just follow the flow..
this is the article i wrote when the incident happened.
click.
i think the biggest cause that make my hate towards her is..
she act so rude to my mum.
before she acted like that,
my hate toward her already..decrease.
but after the incident..
well..
guys, if someone say damn rude thing to ur mum..
will u get angry?
will u wanna protect ur mum?
ya..i did.
im tire with the hate already.
and u know what?
before i see her article,i mean yesterday.
i got talk to her.
of course not like those times larr..
is just..nah,this for my dad.
bring a spoon over.
thats all.
ya, i know..
my parents always keep on "wash my brain"..
ask me not to remember those unhappy things as that just a small matter.
but...i don't know.
i just remember the witch face she shown to my mum n my sis.
u know?
sometime, i saw her sitting alone at the sofa..
i feel like going over there n chat with her.
but no !
i can't do so..
because....??i don't know.

ya..we spent almost 10 years together.
my childhood...
my happiness..is always involved her.
but things changed...

CHANGED !!
no re-change !!!

yan,
please..don't think so much.
it's maybe a trap.
okay?
your life can be colourful without her too..
please.
no !!

my Friday with JF

31/7/2009


yuhooo..
waited for this Friday very very long time already.
dated Lynn n Faye.
planned to go to Gasoline for dinner and tarot cards.

yesterday,
actually i have Chemistry class at Kasturi at 3:30pm.
but the traffic damn jam.
so..i just tell my dad i can skip the class.
lols.
see..im so 明白事理。XD

okay,
go to Jivana straight away.
damn syok.
1st day can practice for such a long time.
it's really different from others Friday.
others Friday i can only practice for about 1 hour.
but yesterday,
i practiced for almost..3hours.
although is very tiring.
but i feel so successful.
because.. finally i can memorize all the steps.
yan !!! must practice more to be perfect !!

after practicing.
i think is a bout..6 something.
okay..still got around half an hour away from the time i meet Faye.
chat with Sheng and Jie.
bla bla bla ..
the clock still goes..tick tock tick tock..
it finally reached 7 !!
haha.. so happy..
go down and wait for my dear Faye.

tick tock tick tock.
7:15pm..
"what time ur friend come?"
"we said meet at here at 7something,but now already 7:15"
"where she come from?"
"behind St.1"
"oh,from there walk over here need some times."
"okay..."

tick tock tick tock.
7:27pm
"wei..why my friend haven't reach de??"
"yalorr..eh,there got many rob cases one.."
"harr??!!..so unlucky meh?"
"yala..last time my friend n i....."
"how??can u lend me ur phone?"
..
made a call to Faye..twice.
but she didn't answer.
lagi worry.
call Lynn.
she can't contact Faye too.
die lorr..heart beat lagi fast.

wondering...
is there any accident?
aiks.

"what your friend look like?is that her?"
"no..she a..short hair and also short short de."
"harr?short short a?lagi mudah 下手!"
"wei...don't scared me lahh.."
"i'm serious, okay?"
arhhhh...

call Lynn again.
huiyo..finally Lynn said that Faye reply her call.
said that she coming.
okay,Jie's dad came.
wait at Berry alone.
those foreigner..suck
see see see..
tak pernah tengok leng lui ke?

as i didn't take my lunch.
quickly run into Berry and buy a bread to ikat perut.
waited till 7:3x..
a voice called...leng lui..
huiyo..finally my dear Faye reached.

walk to the foodcourt to wait for Mr.Rapid.
..
as yesterday,
there was a roud-block right in-front of the kepong police station.
damn jam.this is also the cause of i skipped Chemistry class yerterday.
8:1x finally reached the bus stop.
meet with Lynn.
walk to Gasoline.
the lorong.
dman scary man.
and my two best friend keep on saying..
RAT ARH..COCKROACH ARH..
huiyo..
what a pair of "good friend" i have.lols.

read through the menu for about more than 10 minutes..
lols. as usual la..can't choose my meal.
this time we didn't act like sakai.
don't know.
maybe is because..
we grew older and be mature already?lols.
i think is because the place we be seated does not allow us to act like sakai.

finish our dinner.
then get into a Rapid and walked back to my house for K.
didn't play tarot card.
la la la la...

dong dong dong..12am.
Lynn n Faye's dad reached.
bye ~
lols.

_____________________
after our dinner.
we went to the steamboat buffet restaurant that i always go to ask for a job.
RM 3:50/hour.
damn little.
but still waiting their call.
job wanted.
____________________

arhh..
still got moral assignment haven't finish yet a..
and u know what?
i washed my shoe this morning.
long time didn't wash by myself already.
haha.
*paiseh to say the fact.

By,

Ky.yan

烦恼

流泪，痛哭中。

我不想哭的。
真的不想在家人面前流泪。
我知道她们一定会很担心我。
可是，我就忍不住。
眼泪一直的流。
就停不了。
也很久没酱哭了。

爸妈都以为我是因为他而哭。
其实不是的。
根本就没有你们所想的他。
你们想的他只不过是我的朋友。

终于忍不住了，姐也看到了。
一直问我，到低发生什么事。
可是，我就是那么没有用。
眼泪一直一直得在掉，
我有很多很多想说，
可是...我都说不出口。
因为，一想要开口说，眼泪就涌着出来。
唯有，用被子把脸盖着。
什么都说不了。

说真的，
我真的不明白做别人父母的心情。
有时，
我真的觉得道理在我这里。
可是，每次发了脾气，
都很后悔。
都会觉得，
其实，爸妈有他们的想法。
虽然我不知道是什么，可是我知道一定是为我好的。
可是，我只希望你们不要再把我当成小孩。
我就来16了。
我会分对与错了，重与轻了。

做工。
我不可能去那些cafe做。
因为都要做到很夜的。
我知道我自己一定会定不顺的。
虽然说，我在家也一样那么晚睡，
可是，有做工和在家里休息是不一样的。
所以，我想去那些店that在9点多，10点关的。
可是，我的时间呢?
我真的不知道。
想到时间的方面，
其实，最方便的就是彬那里。
拜六礼拜，算时间。
又轻松。
可是，家人却不给。

我知道。
我明白。
可是这是目前为止，我想到最好的选择了。

我知道，姐现在做工了，
也有自己的东西烦。
我真的不想烦她的。
对不起。

糟了，
我的眼睛明天一定很丑。
Ky.yan